Gotta get the ball rolling to recovery

Hey guys, it sure has been a long time since my last post wouldn't you say? Well, for the last few months my life has been extremely challenging. I have been in and out emergency rooms four times now, as well as had numerous blood tests and ct/bone scans. I am now stuck in a wheelchair and I have very limited control and strength in my left leg. My bone scan shows a spot on my spine that is most likely cancerous and it is most likely the cause of the pain and my inability to walk. I have since been forwarded to an oncologist for treatment but he has yet to contact me about a plan of action. His nurse says they will get in touch tomorrow and we should then get things rolling for treatment.

I will keep this blog updated more often as I set out on my second battle against cancer. I've beaten it before, and I guess I am going to have to teach this disease another lesson. I'm in some pain right now so i'll cut this post short, but fyi, I am staying in high spirits and keeping a positive outlook. Look for more updates soon.

Could it be back for round two?

I am in my bed posting from my phone but I thought I should update you on what is going on. As of right now the pain is not that bad thanks to these new pain pills I got yesterday, they are called Dilaudids and are extremely potent. I have an appointment tomorrow with my urologist, he wants to get my stent out as soon as possible. Also, I will probably be hearing the results of my blood test, they are testing for cancer, he is afraid that it has come out of remission therefore causing the swollen lymph nodes in my back which is causing the pain. I really just hope that this is due to an infection as opposed to being the return of my cancer, but right now I am ready for any news, good or bad, I just want to find a solution for all this pain....

I'll keep you updated.....

Agony...

Everyday since I made my last post has been agony. My entire mid-section is in constant pain. I have been to the ER three times in the past two weeks. I average only around 3-4 hours of sleep per night. I can hardly walk or bend over without intense pain. I don't know what I did to cause or deserve this, but I feel that this is a true test of my will. I have to stay positive that this will get better, and hope that my doctors will get to the bottom of this. I swear that I am now changed man, and if I get through this I will appreciate life much more than I have been. I will keep you updated on my cindition, and right now I am hard at work raising money to see a specialist, so please keep me in your thoughts and prayers, thank you.

Infection

Just like the band Disturbed says, "If I am to survive, the infection must die".....

I was diagnosed with a urinary tract and kidney infection yesterday at the hospital and I have since started taking antibiotics and rather strong pain meds. I hope I get better soon because I have been feeling simply horrible these past few days.

I'll keep you all updated on my condition, until then, I'm gonna try and get more rest.....

...and the health problems arise.....

As I am writing this, my lower back and kidneys are pounding in pain, as they have been all night. If it wasn't for a heating pad and pain pills, I doubt I would have gotten any sleep at all. I am looking to possibly check myself into the hospital today, and I have already called out of work and let them know what is going on. I'm a little nervous as to what could be wrong, with my checkered history in my health, I always get scared when it comes to hospitals and tests now.

To be honest, this doesn't feel like the pain did back when I had my bout with cancer. That pain was not so localized to my lower back like this is. Also then, it felt better to get up and walk, and this time, walking is a tough ordeal since this is making me feel very stiff.

I had one, absolutely one glimmer of good luck yesterday that made the pain feel like it didn't exist for one split-second yesterday, thanks to an email I got from someone. :) It was great hearing from her again, and I am glad that she is doing well and keeping busy. I wish her the best, and maybe we can gradually take steps to fixing our friendship....who knows, but I remain hopeful.

I am most likely picking up a smartphone tomorrow. I found a great pre-paid Android phone that will be perfect for me to use, and it definitely come in good use just in case I have to stay in the hospital longer than I am planning. I'll keep you updated.....

My Promise

If we're friends, you don't ever have to worry about me deciding to completely ignore you, no matter what you do. I will always keep a line of communication open with you, and I will always be willing to talk to you to fix any problems that may arise between us.

It's the night before

Well, here we are. The night before my interview tomorrow. How will it go? Will I act like a nervous wreck? Will I mess up my words and act all nervous? Usually, I seem to handle nervousness with a fair amount of ease. I thought I would feel pretty nervous right now, but in actuality, I don't.

What I want is to just put this place I work at now behind me. Sure, there are a few people there that I will miss, but I am tired of the drama, and I don't like the management...and I want out, plain and simple.

If I do get this job, I plan on working out a two week notice where I'm at now. That will give me enough time to say my goodbyes to everyone, and hopefully will get "someone" to step forward and speak to me, if only it's just to say "goodbye" or "good luck" then that will be good enough for me. When you had strong feelings for someone, and then you don't even hear their voice for over a month now, it makes things tough.....but that's a whole other subject I don't want to get into right now.

I leave for the hospital at 8am tomorrow. When I get back and when it's all said and done, I'll update the blog on what happened, and what I think will happen next.

Wish me luck!